Sirius Black: Thoughts of an Innocent Man
by Sirius's Soul Mate
Summary: Sirius Black's thoughts while in Azkaban. Kinda short and angsty. Please R&R, flames welcome (I guess). [I suck at summaries.]


A/N: Hey everyone! This is a fic that I wrote about Sirius Black's thoughts while in Azkaban. All written from Sirius's POV, of course. Please R&R, flames will be used to light the fire!  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Unfortunately, everything belongs to J.K. Rowling. I wish I owned Sirius...  
  
~*~*~  
  
My name is Sirius Black. I am imprisoned in Azkaban, left here to rot, convicted for a crime I didn't commit. I don't know how long I have been here, or what year or month it is. I have no idea how old I am, or what day of the week it is. I know it has been a very long time since I first came here. My hair has grown past my shoulders and hangs in tangled knots. I am incredibly filthy and haven't taken a shower for months, possibly years. I tried to keep track of time; to make a little scratch on the wall for each day. But I just gave up after a while. It doesn't even matter what year or month or day it is because I am confined here for life. And I have a long time to wait. I see the other prisoners going mad. Their screaming is unbearable. But the quiet is even worse. When they are quiet it means they have finally given up; have lost all hope.  
  
Despite all of this, I know one thing. I am innocent. I may not know what year or month it is, but I do know this. I'm innocent. Even if I'm the only one who knows. I repeat this over and over as I rot in this godforsaken hellhole. The dementors can't suck it out of me. It is the only thing I know for a fact. That I'm innocent. I may have lost my best friends, my godson, my freedom, my hope, and possibly my sanity, but I have not lost this thought.  
  
Wait, I haven't lost my hope. I still have that. I hope that one day I will figure out a way to escape this desolate place. Then I can tell Harry the truth; he deserves to know. I wonder how old he is now. Does he still look like James? Even as a baby, he always looked like James. Except for the eyes. He has Lily's dazzling green eyes. Have people told him? That I supposedly betrayed his parents, and sent them to their graves?  
  
Never. I would sooner die than betray Lily and James. Or Remus. To me, betrayal is the ultimate sin. You should never betray someone who trusts you. Or tell secrets that someone has confided in you. This is the worst thing you could do to a friend; to someone who trusted you.  
  
Trust. Lily and James trusted me and I let them down. So, I as good as killed them. I just performed my own ultimate sin. I not only betrayed them, but I am also a hypocrite. And Peter. I trusted him fully. I thought he would die for the rest of us, just as I would. I never even thought that he could be the spy. It was the perfect plan.  
  
Peter was so lazy, and talentless. Voldemort would obviously think of me. I was James's best friend, of course. He would come after me while Peter, the REAL secret keeper, would be safe and sound. REAL secret keeper my ass. He is NOT a secret keeper, he divulged the secret, and therefore betrayed us. I made a giant mistake. A mistake which led to the horrible death of two of my best friends. All because I was scared I would crack. That I would tell Voldemort where they were. They trusted me completely. They put their lives in my hand, and I let them down. They are dead because of me.  
  
Tonight is a full moon; I can see it from the small, roughly-cut window in this cell. I wonder what Remus is doing, if he's bitten anyone yet. Remus. How could I have suspected him; how could I have thought he was the spy? He's my only remaining friend. No, scratch that. I saw the look on his face at my pathetic excuse for a trial (or rather lack of one). An expression of disgust mixed with disbelief and helplessness. I've lost him too. Now that I've lost everything that was dear to me, all I can do is sit here and think. About what would have happened if I didn't make that one awful decision. The decision that ended two lives, and ruined lots more.  
  
My name is Sirius Black. And I am innocent.  
  
~*~*~  
  
A/N: Semmel - I took off the last sentence just for you!  
  
Another A/N: Please R&R. 


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